Social Separation

In the last few months, I’ve had to explain to some what social networks I use for what. Mostly due to the fact that there are so many of them now and how most of us are compelled to join some or all of them. It gets to be a bit on the overload side. Plus there’s some people that I like to only be a part of certain networks.

From the beginning of joining each one I frequent, I’ve pretty much stuck to how I’ve separated them into what role they play in my life. Here is a break down of the big four that I belong to and my defined management of their purpose in my life.


This is my uncensored place to say whatever the fuck I want, when I want and without restraint. For those times where I feel I need to censor myself on Twitter, I get very uncomfortable. I don’t like co-workers following me because I like to post a rant here and there. I block spammers pretty quick and very regularly. With extremely rare exceptions, I don’t like to either follow or be followed by family. In the last year or two, I’ve mostly stayed away from political discussions, with maybe a few tweets that surround a political news story or event, but then it’s back to what I see, what I’m thinking and finding something cool to Twitpic. Discussions with others, sharing stories, funny observations and made up funny phrases under 140 characters. Twitter is most likely the best place to find me, but it’s also the place that I don’t want everyone finding me at. Make sense? It’s nothing personal… well, it is… but just because I want to be open and free without worry or concern.


Checking in to places that I’ve been to is fun. I enjoy seeing how many times I visit the grocery store, Starbucks and Del Taco and collecting stamps for special days or events. And maybe even becoming mayor of an oft visited venue. Some say that I’m opening myself up to anyone online finding me and doing really bad things to me or my belongings. And that’s where I draw the line of where I WON’T check into. Two places… work and home. I omit those places for several reasons, the biggest of which is that I don’t need people knowing when I go home or when I’m at work. Yes, some of my tweets say where I’m at, but it’s vague and nothing specific. Geo-tagging where I work and live goes too far for me when spending time in the online world. Others do it and that’s their thing. Just not mine.


More recently known as My [______], I rarely log on to that big, giant empty space these days. Back in the day, it was the disorganized place on the web where you could share your thoughts, add a friend and hear some music from your favorite band. Today, the tech blogs are wondering who will purchase this aging social network and for how many pennies on the dollar it will trade ownership to. Simply put, it’s not on my radar anymore.


Mostly family, friends, people I attended school with, bloggers I’ve conversed with and the rare co-worker that I’ve become friends with. Everyone else, I don’t add. If I did, it’s because… um… that I found… aw, fuck.. I don’t know why I added them. Maybe it was a impulse thing I did that day I clicked ok. OK!

There’s many that I am friends with on Facebook that I rarely share common interests with anymore. Most of are those who I used to share a common set of religious beliefs with. I like to keep them as friends because, regardless of what I don’t believe in anymore, I still consider them friends that I grew up with or shared some great times with in life. Fan pages that I used to like on My [______] are now liked on Facebook. My status messages are honest, but sanitized – meaning, I don’t swear in them past damn or hell. I also don’t play any Ville games and block just about any of my friends’ statuses about missing cows and sheep. Zynga has enough money and I have other games that I play offline that are more entertaining to me.


This network is pretty much kept to those people that I directly worked with at one of the companies I’ve been employed by or [in very rare circumstances] someone who I feel could be a good reference for me that I’ve not directly worked with. I won’t even add some people that work at my site due to the fact that I’ve not worked directly with them and most likely only fixed their printer or removed a virus from their computer. Not to sound high and mighty, but I don’t define my LinkedIn colleagues as each and every person that was employed by the companies I’ve worked for. Pretty much think of those that I would consider references that really know what work I’ve done.

Google Buzz

I check this each day, mostly for news articles that I’ve missed from other sites. I find a few pretty regular people here that post some informative and entertaining posts. It’s not as Buzzed as other social networks, but it’s a nice place to visit daily.


The media lovers social hangout. I like music, movies, books, artists, musicians, authors, directors, TV shows… it’s a fun site that I’ve enjoyed sharing likes and a few dislikes with. When I watch a TV show, I check in. When I’m listening to a new album, I write a quick review. All around fun and not that intrusive in the social ether.

The “Unfollow” Factor

Specifically to Twitter and Facebook, I really don’t go out of my way to check nor do I care who unfollows me. On occasion, I will see my followers list go down by a person or two and I admit to being curious who it was, but overall, I really don’t care. It’s that person that doesn’t want to follow me anymore and for whatever reason and I’m cool with that. I’m also not of the mindset that I need to follow back someone that does follow me. Maybe they like what I’m saying, but I don’t have much interest in what they have to say. That may sound like a calloused thing to say, but it’s not me trying to be mean.

Okay, now it’s your turn. Any of my rules make sense? Do you have similar preferences? Tell me… tell me.. tell me.

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  1. B.E. Earl says:

    The only one I do is Twitter and you are one of the 2 dozen or so I follow.

    That’s it.

    1. martymankins says:

      When I found you were on Twitter, I was wondering why I hadn’t followed you yet. Now I am.

  2. Dave2 says:

    I do it all. I Twitter. I Facebook. I Gowalla. I Whatever.

    But, like my blog, I still don’t talk about my family, work, or offline friends. If I need to vent, I vent to my co-workers, my family, or my friends. :-)

    1. martymankins says:

      Family and friends shouldn’t have their lives dragged into social networking, unless of course, they do it themselves. 😉

  3. Megan says:

    I do Twitter and Facebook. I’m also on LinkedIn, but can’t figure how I want to use that yet.

    Beyond that, I don’t feel like I have time for most of that stuff. Which is probably why I only have a couple of hundred followers on Twitter.

    1. martymankins says:

      The LinkedIn is pretty well defined for me. I’ve seen some crossover from other social networks, but it’s all about employment connections.

  4. I only use facebook. I used to use twitter but couldn’t keep up. I dislike that certain people are my friends on facebook because of how it makes me edit myself a bit. I know you can block certain people from certain posts but thinking about figuring out who to block from what makes my head hurt so I just don’t. And then I worry that I will accidentally offend someone so I rarely use facebook now too.

    1. martymankins says:

      Twitter can be overwhelming. I’ve not had to block anyone on Facebook yet.

  5. Of those you list I only do Twitter. The only other one I do that you didn’t list is

    1. martymankins says:

      I need to get out to more. My daughter uses it a lot (scrobbles). And also to check out your list of music favorites.

  6. twitter killed my blog. i love my twitter. don’t care who follows me, i say what i want, when i want.
    facebook i check maybe once every six to 12 months. anyone i know i accept the friend request because i know i won’t be saying a damn thing over there. hate all of those worlds crashing…family, work, internet friends, people i didn’t even like in 10th grade, etc. bullshit site.
    myspace i forget the stupid password and honestly don’t care. surprisingly, i liked it better than facebook. then again, i like just about anything better than facebook.
    linkedin pisses me off. can’t explain it since i can’t put my finger on it, but still…i just don’t like it. probably because i don’t currently need a job!
    i don’t check in anywhere. i know where i am, i know what i am watching. if i want others to know, i have the twitter.
    how about i didn’t even know the name of any site you could check to know if someone unfollowed you? then again, i don’t care if they do. it is entirely too difficult to follow a zillion people and i don’t mind if someone has to cut me in order to make their life easier or better. not everyone has to like me and know all about my every moment. i’m cool with that. if i send them a direct message that can’t get through then i will know they no longer follow me.

    sheesh, i sound like a bitch. it is friday…why am a kinda cranky?
    peace, love, luck and lollipops!

    1. martymankins says:

      We’ve had the checkin discussion on twitter before. I do my best to reduce mindless checkins out of respect for others. Which is one reason why I don’t check into my work or home.

  7. Sybil Law says:

    Oh, man – now we need to get Kevin Spencer and Earl on Facebook! :)

    I do Twitter and Facebook. I have a LinkedIn account, but really, I never use it for any reason whatsoever.
    I pretty much don’t ever want people to know where I am, so I don’t use any of those social network things.

    1. martymankins says:

      ha ha.. yeah, get those two on Faceborg.

      And twitter makes it all that much more awesome with your tweets… drunk tweets, too.

  8. Robin says:

    I got rid of my Facebook for so many reasons – the main one being I was never on that thing. When I was, it was to wade through friend requests of people who I either work with that wanted to know my business (and that I wouldn’t fuck with someone else’s pussy or trust as far as I could throw them…which isn’t very far), people that I haven’t seen for years or people I went to high school with that I have no real interest in being friends with. Add to this that recruiters and prospective employers use Facebook as a vetting tool made me give it the stink eye. How people found me on that thing while it was private was crazy. While I miss it sometimes, chances are I won’t be re-signing up for it.

    I use to use LinkedIn as a Facebook of sorts, but now that I am exploring other options work-wise, I won’t add anyone else that isn’t a professional contact.

    Foursquare for me is a guilty pleasure – I just want to be mayor of places….I don’t care whether people follow me or not. Twitter really is the best thing for me. I can truly say what I want (my feed for the most part is private) and can talk to my friends without texting. It can be quite cliquey, but then again so is the blogging world, so it’s nothing I haven’t experienced before.

    My Space is corny and has always been corny. I ditched MySpace for Facebook. I predict MySpace will go away. I am on GetGlue, but it’s annoying so I probably will let my account lapse.

    1. martymankins says:

      You make a really good point about potential employers vetting based on Facebook posts. I’ve read a good many articles and have hear first hand from some who got turned down from jobs because of the occasional pic of them having a beer.

      I share you Mayor quest with Foursquare. I get bummed when I’m outed as mayor of someplace.

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