* I might be off by a few years

Happy Birthday, Hilly

Good thing she was 21 at Avitable’s party…

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY

original image found on an E-Card over at Allrecipes.com

Ok, now that I got that out of the way, let me continue.

I have to admit something here. I’m pretty neutral when it comes to Valentine’s Day. There’s the enormous amount of commercial ties to the day that make you feel like a loser if you are not spending endless amount of money on your significant other. There’s the pressure of getting just the right gift or doing the right things to make the day an effigy of success for your relationship. There’s the concern for making sure the right bouquet or floral arrangement is delivered to your partner’s work so that he/she can show it off to others, as a sign to the rest of the world that the person they are in a relationship with at least thought of them on the one day that matters.

I hate those pressures. They seem so superficial to me. External layers to keep you out of the doghouse one day a year. Don’t get me wrong. I do those things and have done those things. But they are not what makes up a relationship.

Which brings me to the point of this blog post. Loving someone else requires you love yourself.

When Hilly posted her Self Love post the other day, I have to admit that the first thing that crossed my mind had more to do with products like these or web sites like this to help you fulfill your own personal satisfactions [WARNING: NSFW links]. But then I read her post again and saw item #2:

• “You’re gonna post that banner and then tell us all something that you really like love about yourself (thus, the “self-love” portion of our program).”

Let’s see… banner posted. Check.

What do I love about myself?

I actually had to think about this one for a bit. Not that there’s things that don’t instantly come to mind like making people laugh, trying my best to be patient and being a responsible member of society. Those are things I love about myself. But I think the one thing that I really love about myself is that I can feel comfortable in a relationship with another person that sees the qualities I don’t see. The things that I’m critical about myself that my partner doesn’t see as negative.

And that’s where I do a bit of not only self love, but self re-evaluating of knowing that I’m alright. I’m a good person and my life matters to not just others, but to myself as well.

So go celebrate the day, with someone you like or love, or with just yourself.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to run. I’ve got to go find that perfect gift.